Season 3 : The One Volume Edition

So, I'm back. Yeah, it's been a few months and our burgeoning readership has surely left this blog for other more active pursuits. This means that [you] are getting in on this thing at square one once again. Excitement pours through [your] veins, delivered by obscure glands placed by genetic minions in a past age.

To explain my absence, I really have no excuse, but I will tell you some stories about Chicagoans and Winter that may or may not be true:

A. Chicagoans hate weather that includes anything falling from the sky. If it comes from above, it must be acid or ice-nine. In other places, it is true: rain and snow will cause people to operate with more caution. In this city, though, we choose to simply operate at the lowest level required for survival when the skies open their drain pipes; in many cases, this consists of not-functioning. If the world were the Matrix Reloaded, other weather-embattled cities like Minneapolis would be a cave rave orgy; Chicago would be Neo and Trinity walking off to their apartment pod. This is escalated by:

B. Gas bills suck. Chicagoans live in poorly insulated buildings with archaic furnaces. In late summer when we should be replacing windows and completing annual maintenance to heating units, we are out wandering lakefront parks, streets and air-conditioned shops, baking under a sun that makes us forget Winter ever happened. So, when It finally arrives, we act sideswiped by humbling gas bills for minimally heated living spaces. The direct result, of course, is that we are substantially poorer in the winter time.

That said, the Coming of Spring is an event of tremendous revitalization for both the soul and the wallet and, in turn, the soul again. The promise of roaming glowing neighborhoods through warm but breezy midnights and of barrelling through pedestrians crossing the bikepath to go swimming is all the pituitary you'd ever need.

So, ya. Another season of this blog is upon us. If that makes any sense at all.